What is a Community?

In his book, "Different Drum", M. Scott Peck asked the same question and offered many possible answers. The one I like best is his metaphor of it being like a gem, with multi-faceted properties, that it originates, like a gem, as stone in the ground, full of potentials. Like a gem shining in its multi-faceted glory only after long and hard work, of prospecting, of digging and excavating, of cleaning and polishing, of cutting and more polishing, so too, is the work of creating community. It begins as a group of people, then with a lot of work to establishing communication, to create common bonds, to find compromises, to give up agenda, to yield ego to feelings, to learn acceptance, to create an atmosphere of inclusivity, and to embrace diversity, before a group emerges as a community.

He used the example of his own marriage, with his wife, in a community of two, to illustrate the long process of learning accepting each other's differences as gifts that strengthens the union, not as differences that divides. The hostility and divisiveness we experience when we encounter people with different background, different opinions, different attitudes, are the result of our own attitudes, of judging others, of trying to change and convert them to our own ways, our own opinions, our own frames of reference. In a community, people are accepted unconditionally as they are, without judgment, without provisions to change. Instead, each person's unique and distinctive differences from the norm become a part of the whole, and the whole is greater for it.

One of the great enemies of community building is exclusivity. M. Scott Peck said in his book that the burden of proof is for those who wish to exclude, and ask, "Why should this person be excluded from us?" Not to ask why we should include someone. Just like freedom, membership in a community belongs to those who wish it. And exclusivity can be imposed not only by others upon others, but also by ourselves upon the self. Those who withdraw from community, for whatever reason, is giving up, is excluding him or her self, from the joy of community.

I have always felt uncomfortable in cliques of any kind, whether in high school, or in office politics. It never occured to me until now, understanding community, after having read the book many years ago, and for the first time, reflecting on it. Cliques are exclusive by definition, and an enemy of community. As Peck said in the book, when a community has enemies, it begins to lose its spirit. A community is peaceful.

It is the nature of my fractal reflections that allows me to explore the occasional new territory and feel the benefit of a cathartic experience when the walls within come tumbling down, healing old wounds, and opening up new vistas.

When Christ told the disciples that whenever two or three of them gathered together, there he would be. I see that as a promise of community, provided they follow his commandment, to love one another as he loved them. Indeed, in order for there to be a community of people, there must be first a community of two, a personal relationship between the self and God, a higher power.

M. Scott Peck has mentioned the religious-mystic nature of his community experiences, but also emphasized that it is not
exclusive to Christians or any particular religion. People from all walks of spiritual life, including those who are agnostic and atheist, have been part of communities, and felt the spiritual transformation that comes with the experience. It is not the name of Name, but the experience, of being. Instead of defining the number of angels that can dance on the head of a pin, old theologians would benefit much more from simply dancing in joy to celebrate the Grace of the Gospel, to be children again.

Our language, any language, simple lacks the capacity to describe, to define, to discuss certain aspects and concepts of community, not only because by its very nature it is difficult, but also because by our very history, our language lacks the vocabulary to describe an experience so new and perhaps, alien to the human condition. I have heard that Inuits and others in the Artic have dozens of words to describe different kinds of snow, under different weather conditions, etc. We lack the vocabulary to describe community, in its many stages, and under different conditions as it evolves from a stone, to a gem.